The Hangover That Sobriety Couldn’t Fix
How I Swapped One Escape for Another & What I Finally Learned
I stopped drinking in June, 2017.
But I didn’t stop escaping.
Sobriety wasn’t the end of my addiction; it was the beginning of realising how many ways I had been running from myself. When I put down alcohol, I picked up something else.
Hustling. Grinding. Saying yes to everything.
To the outside world and even to myself, it looked like control. It looked like ambition. It looked like I had it together.
But underneath? It was the same old story. The same need to outrun discomfort. The same desperate search for relief.
The coping mechanism changed, but the pattern remained.
Disguising Escape as Success
At first, I thought sobriety would fix my life. But when I quit, I still felt the same restlessness, the same hunger. So I fed it in new ways.
Instead of chasing ‘fun’, I chased achievement. Instead of losing myself to a boozy weekend, I lost myself to work.
And just like with everything else, it had a cost.
Burnout. Exhaustion. Resentment.
And financially? I thought I was saving money, but I would still go on to burn some serious holes in my pockets, chasing ‘solutions’ that never actually worked.
Because it wasn’t just alcohol.
It wasn’t just dieting.
It wasn’t just work I became addicted to.
It was really an addiction to validation, control, performing and proving myself worthy of something I could never quite define.
And maybe you know this feeling too.
The Moment I Saw It For What It Was
It wasn’t a dramatic rock bottom.
No collapse, no intervention. Just a quiet moment of realisation.
I had spent years trying to earn my worth—through service, through work, through being ‘good enough’, ‘useful’ & ‘helpful’ to others.
But no amount of achievement ever made me feel safe in myself. And I finally saw why:
It was never about the things I was chasing. It was about what I was avoiding.
Surrender Is the Hardest Thing to Do—But the Only Thing That Works
So I did something radical.
I stopped running.
I stopped performing online & chasing the algorithm. I got a normal job. I started working the 12 steps—not just for sobriety, but for life.
I let go of the belief that my worth was tied to numbers—whether on a scale, a pay-check, or a follower count.
And I started learning how to be with myself, instead of constantly trying to escape.
Now, my daily journaling practice isn’t about figuring out where I went wrong—it’s about noticing where I’m going right.
It’s about tracking the moments where I stand still instead of sprinting for the next ‘fix.’
Because if there’s one thing I know now, it’s this:
You don’t just quit drinking or dieting, or hustling.
You quit escaping.
You quit believing that happiness is something you have to earn.
And you start learning that real peace comes from being present in your own life—exactly as it is.
Ready to Do the Work? (Paid Subscribers Only)
If this resonates, I have a practical exercise to help you explore your own patterns of escape—and how to start shifting them.
🔒 Inside today’s paid section:
✔️ Identifying Your ‘Go-To’ Escapes – What do you reach for when you don’t want to feel discomfort?
✔️ The ‘Invisible Hangover’ Exercise – Spotting the hidden cost of overworking, overgiving, and overperforming.
✔️ How to Shift From Running to Rooting – Three simple steps to stop escaping and start grounding yourself in real peace.
